Oslo

Let not thy mind be overmuch crossed by unwise men at thronged meetings of folk; for oft these speak worse than they wot of; lest thou be called a dastard, and art minded to think that thou art even as is said; slay such an one on another day, and so reward his ugly talk.

from the Volsunga Saga

I think it only fair to point out that I have been here before. Twenty or something years ago on tour with the Pacific Lutheran University Wind Ensemble. I even took a semester of Norwegian to enhance my experience, though frankly, English is so ubiquitous with the native population that there’s little point.

The good news? I remember almost all of the Norwegian that I once knew. The bad news? No one here speaks Norwegian, or, rather, people here immediately stop speaking Norwegian as soon as they recognize that you hail from the West. Still, it makes me feel just that much more like the protagonist in some sort of spy thriller. You know, when Tony Stark starts speaking French with a flawless accent while racing cars in Monaco? When James Bond busts out the Catalan while gambling in Sardinia? Yep, that's my life right now. Of course, it also doesn’t hurt that the remaining 70% of the English Language that was not derived from latin comes pretty much directly from the Viking invasions.

So. Oslo. City-wise, it’s a lot like Victoria, though they speak better English here. Historically? Think Viking Ships, Polar Explorers, Advocates for World Peace, Leggy Blondes, and lots of spendy museums devoted to these things, except perhaps the last. At least I didn’t find one. Could still be out there.

Nonetheless, here’s the tourist bit. I’ll try to cover the real reason I came back to Oslo in the next post.

This is the thoroughly horrid Karl Johan’s Gate, the place in Oslo where one can get the worst prices on plastic Viking helmets keychains of only the cheapest quality. There seems to be an area like this in every tourist city: where the tourist is met by his expectations.


With a little more historical bent, here are the Kon-Tiki and the Ra II: vessels built by Thor Heyerdahl which changed the perceptions of anthropologists regarding the interaction of early human societies. Following clues left in the ships logs of Spanish explorers, Heyerdahl theorized that South American civilizations could have colonized or originated the peoples of Polynesia. To prove his point, he constructed this raft, the Kon-Tiki, out of balsa logs and indigenous materials, and set sail from Peru.
Crazy Norwegians! I’d be okay with sailing from Peru to Fiji, I’m just not sure I’d do it on a balsa raft.

Some years later, noting the prevalence of reed boats in civilizations throughout the world, Heyerdahl completed a similar experiment sailing the Ra II from Morocco to Barbados to prove the possibility that ancient Egyptians sailed ocean-going vessels of exploration.


This is the Fram. No idea if it’s related to the oil filter. This was one of the most important vessels used in the exploration of both polar regions. The egg-shaped hull allows for the building pressure of ice to push the vessel up, rather than crushing it.


This is the Nobel Institute. You know, where they give out that prize?


On a lark, and having heard that it might be easier to get one than the last time I was in town (Jimmy Carter built houses and hospitals for the world’s poor for what? 20 years…?), I stopped in to ask if I could have one.


Well, look at that. They ARE giving them away. Num!

Next time: the Vigeland Sculpture Park.